How to Happify Yourself (the science of ^_^)

Not feeling your best today? GREAT.

Because I have some foil-proof ways to help improve your day.

Obviously, I am no stranger to depression. I too, at this moment, wish to punch a wall and wail into my pillow.


So do you want to find out how I went from this:

To this:

Here’s a list of things I did-

1. Find someone to blame

This will come in handy for the other tips down below. If you have someone to direct your source of sadness at, you can turn that sadness into anger. Anger is much more fun that sadness.

Can’t find someone to point a finger at? NONSENSE. There is always someone in your life you can be angry at. If not in your life, then a stranger.

That Starbucks lady who didn’t give you enough cream? JERK.

That guy who bumped into you “accidentally?” IMBECILE.

When all else fails, pick a side on the gay rights debate and protest at your nearest Chik-Fil-A or Oreo place.

Gays and religious bigots are the source of all our troubles. Mainly gays, of course.

2. Twitter Rant

Yup, just go on Twitter (or your choice social media) and unleash a hailstorm of anger onto your followers timeline. In fact, if the person behind your hurt and anger is on twitter (see #1), SPAM THEM TIL THEY DIE… or until they block you. Trust me, you will feel better after a few “My life is so f**** screwed up!” and “I hate everybody!” and of course “@personyouhate is a *@%%% who needs to *%@**& off a *&%$##!!”

You may lose a few followers (and friends) but all you have to do is rinse and repeat… “@annoyedfollower just unfollowed me. Yeah, you can go die.”

3. Be a (b)witch the whole day.

If you don’t have a social media account (or don’t realize that wordpress is one), you can just take out your anger in real life. Leave angry notes on said person’s front door. Be angry at random people for no paticular reason. And go ahead and complain to your best friend about your situation for hours. Doesn’t matter if he/she is at a job or school, if they’re true, they’ll listen to you.

Also, kick a homeless person. Just because.

4. Food

Because food is the answer for everything.

The general rule for eating when down? The fatter, the better.

Shove a couple big macs down with a large coke, throw in some chocolate chip cookies, and finish it off with a dozen fried twinkies. Then, continue with the main course.

It will definitely put a smile on your face (and fat in your clogged arteries, whatevs).

5. Ignore everything I just said & realize your awesomeness.

Getting passed a low point is different for everybody.

Some prefer to vent to family/friends for comfort.

Others like to snuggle up in their camo snuggie and watch My Strange Addiction.

Whatever it is, know that it’s ok to be sad; no matter how superficial the reason. Just realize that you, as an extremely amazing person, matter. Why? Because you were put here on this Earth and have the capabilities of making your and someone else’s life special. Chances are, you already have.

So go ahead, cry your eyes out, get it over with. After that, take up your favorite hobby (for me it’s talking to myself online) and smile.

That’s it, smile and tell yourself life is too short to be sad for too long.

That’s all I have for you. If you think that was cheesy, I’ll have you know I am 100% cheddar.

Your beloved blogger,

P.S. I am not responsible for any lawsuits you receive from harassing people online or kicking the homeles.


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